Our Journey Thus Far

When we started this journey 3 years ago I had no idea that I would be where I am today. I am going to share how my infertility came to surface and what action we have taken thus far.

At 13 AF came to visit for the first time, that seemed normal but then she was seen only about once a year, at the time it was quite pleasant actually. I didn't have to worry about the unexpected visit or about making sure I was prepared.

I was okay with my body not working properly until I began having pain and realized that AF staying away for so long was probably not the best for my body. I went to the doctor only to be told that  birth control would fix the problem and with a sample pack and prescription in my hand I was sent on my way.

Months past and still no AF even with birth control, the bcp made me feel anxious and crabby and just not myself and since they weren't working I tossed them out. What is the point anyway?

After high school I was still dealing with rounds of pain and still had no answers. I went back to the doctor and this time had my first pap(yippy!), blood tests, more bcp and sent on my way. Later I received a phone call saying that I had PCOS and to just take the bcp and it would work my cycles out. Again the bcp failed to do what they said and I tossed them, still not knowing the seriousness of the issue.

In April of 2008 I married my wonderful husband, knowing that we wanted children, and lots of them, we started trying right away.  6 months and nothing brought me back to the doctor where I pushed for a referral. I first went to a gyno who sent me for blood work and a HSG and I was immediately referred to one of the 2 RE in town. The RE called to set up an appointment and said they had all my records and results.

The day I walked into that appointment I didn't really know what was going to happen or how things would turn out, I was scared to know the truths about my body and so afraid that having children would be an unreachable goal. We talked about my HSG and how my tubes were clear but the top wall of my uterus was curved(not a big problem but not normal either), it was confirmed that I had PCOS and that I would have to use medicines to get pregnant. The doctor scheduled a semen analysis and an ultrasound, and very confidently said we would be pregnant before we knew it.

January 2009, SA looked great, ultrasound not so much, and us having children rested completely on my body cooperating. I took provera to get AF moving and planned my first cycle of clomid following AF. I remember thinking wow I will have a child in about 9 months, how naive I was! I guess I thought I was getting a miracle pill. We continued with 4 cycles of clomid with an HCG injection just waiting to be used and lots and lots of ultrasounds and blood work and scheduled sex and hpt and nothing. During these 4 cycles we saw no changes, nothing even measurable. We were still encouraged to follow through every month as if it could be the month, nothing. My 4th cycle caused a lot of pain and the last ultrasound showed a cyst has just ruptured, we decided it was break time, my body needed a rest, my mind needed a rest and so did the checkbook.

It is amazing how long 4 cycles takes when you have to take 10 days worth of pills to even start a period and make sure your blood work comes back clear before you can start them, and holiday interruptions and vacation. Our life was a whirlwind and I felt I was already in too deep. Everything I ever wanted seemed to have been stolen away. We needed a break and we needed to refocus and we needed to know our options and needed a plan. I needed God's guidance. I spent months talking to our RE about a plan, searching doctors, going to workshops, searching the internet and looking at our options and seeking the face of God...all the while still taking provera and taking hpt regularly.

After a lengthy break, in October 2010 I called to get into an ob/gyn who specializes in PCOS. When I asked if she was excepting new patients and the nurse who is also in charge of scheduling said only ob patients but she could find me someone else. I wasn't giving up that easy I felt as if I was lead to her and I was going to see her. I told my reasoning and part of my story, the nurse asked me to hold and returned to the phone telling me how the doctor would love to see me. I was thrilled, and made an appointment, but not able to get in until January.

 At my first appointment we talked about my story, how I found her, what all the ins and outs of PCOS really are and discussed what we would try. I went ahead and got a whole physical out of the way including an uterine biopsy (ouch!) and pap. we scheduled blood work and a followup after all my Dr records and results had made it back to her. I expressed how I felt the need to become healthy and make sure my body was ready for a baby before moving forward with the RE and she agreed that would be best. I received a phone call an set up appointments for more blood work, fasting and non, for comparison and moved my appointment back. I was also informed that my pap and biopsy came back fine so I didn't need to worry about that.  

In March I found myself in that same office ready to talk everything out and understand my body a bit more. She told me that I have extreme insulin resistance with i found out for the first time generally goes hand in hand with PCOS.  She prescribed metformin and suggested I work on losing as much excess weight as I could. She was also the first doctor who told me that would help and could possibly be enough to jump start AF on its own. She told me that the bcp that i had taken in the past weren't strong enough for my body and that is why nothing happened. After sharing so much information I was sent on my way encouraged and enlightened.  I scheduled yet more blood work for after metformin and ultrasounds for different times in my cycle to see if there is any change at all.

I have just worked myself up to 1500mg metformin a day and every ultrasound seems to look as if I am in the same phase of my cycle. I have another follow up appointment coming up soon, and hope some progress can be seen.

I am still young in this journey and don't understand all of the ins and outs of IF like many of you do, but I feel the same pain and have the same questions. Does anyone have any suggestions for losing weight with PCOS? anyone tried the metformin route? any advice? anything?

Thanks for listening, for today I am still encouraged for I know we have many options and I know that I serve a big God!